the YELLOW factor …
This is kind of a very touchy subject but I needed to address it, as it has been on my mind.
Like most single gays I spend time on websites, apps for iPhone and other forms of social media looking to meet other gay men. It has come to my attention that in the area that I live in race as is the most important thing, so much so that it even determines friendships.
I understand the whole difference of masculine and feminine in friendships… But race? This I don’t understand.
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part deux …
My best friend recently said that the only reason why I stay out here, or the only reason why I go out to local bars is that I am the only Asian- he then followed by saying this is why I get all these guys… Only because they like asians. That was kind of offensive, but none the less… Is it true?
This was then followed by him saying that only attractive men hit on me, and that I only am seen with attractive men.
So, in my mind I feel like I am being racially profiled, while my best friend sees it as me landing every hot guy I want because I am Asian…
This was then followed by examining past relationships, hook ups and men I talked to…
Here is what I have found in common:
Most of the men I have been in relationships are always attractive and have facial hair. They are always masculine, successful, and charming. They always are in some ways in the arts or admire/support the arts.
Now most of the men I hook up with : 4/5 are latino. 3/5 have a six pack. 1/2 i end up going on a date with.
The men I pursue…
1. attractive. Being attractive to me is someone who is charming and respectable. It necessarily isn’t about looks, or body type. It is something about who they are as an individual.
2. smart. Being smart doesn’t mean having a Phd or masters degree. It just means I can hold conversation with someone on almost any subject, and they will have a retort of some sorts. This is one of the biggest turn ons.
3. successful. Success is in the eye of the beholder. It’s not about money, it isn’t about their position in life. It is about being passionate about life, being passionate about a career, and most of all having goals for themselves.
4. personality. Someone who intrigues me. Someone who makes me laugh. Someone who I can trust. Someone who isn’t afraid of commitment. Someone who is just willing to exist with you.
now 9/10 i’m rejected.
1/4 times we go on a first date that accumulates to nothing…
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Finally part tres…
Gaysian in the City…
My work. At my job being Asian benefits me, a lot. I don’t think because I am Asian I have it easier. In fact, I probably have it a lot harder since the influx of gaysians into the world of fashion. (I blame Alexander Wang, even though I am dying over his Fall 2012 Menswear.) There are plenty of gaysians in the world of fashion now… From designers to bloggers, to new fashion editors making it big… But, I sit here and I ask myself when will I get my break? I work hard, I am passionate about my work, and most of all I am dying to make a difference in the world. So. how does being Asian factor into this? I don’t know, but because of my mood it seems to be that way.
#FOLLOWTHATGAYSIAN 